Maintain up! I do know what ur pondering. A legislation agency sliding into my DMs? Fundamental AF.

Properly, we could be a legislation agency, however we’re bussin. No cap! Fr fr.

So, I do know loads of y’all on the market fw MrBeast. Str8 up loads of folx do. Or did. Possibly u even did some gig work for bruh. Possibly u even unwittingly labored as a henchman for MrBeast, particularly between the dates 5/2023 and 11/2024.

No disgrace in that recreation—lifeless ass, gotta hustle—but in addition perhaps u did some tremendous sketchy and even unlawful shizz and didn’t even notice it on the time? Look, every1 is aware of it used to slay to put on a masks and a hearth leather-based uniform with a MrBeast brand on it and carry like a type of laser rifle to order harmless individuals by means of an more and more elaborate and sadistic sequence of challenges whereas MrBeast stood by laughing and in addition sporting a cape and jodhpurs, we’re fairly certain.

However u kno what? Let me be str8 up w u: That shizz is cheugy. It’s cray to do any kind of henching for MrBeast. Particularly when harmless individuals have gotten hurrrt by him in hella horrifying methods. Huge yikes!

Right here’s the deal—MrBeast is str8 up sus. Aura isn’t on level. We dug into his lore and oof. Major character syndrome a lot? His misdeeds have been caught in 4K.

Fax.

Was he at one level goated with the sauce? Guess. Nevertheless it seems my man is a grasp manipulator. Main sociopath vitality. Loopy delulu. The place did he even get a grimy bomb from? The darkish internet or one thing? My man is in his villain period, and it’s time he took a number of seats. Periodt.

However we’re not attempting to cancel u. We all know u have been only a smol bean in his high-key evil plans. Legally, that could be a legitimate excuse.

So if this feels like one thing u perhaps did, me and the squad at Findley and Wasserman wish to chat w u. U could even be entitled to monetary compensation. It’s lit. And sophistication motion.

We’re right here to assist with lively listening. Be at liberty to trauma dump, besties.

Did u dwell with 20,000 or so different baddies in a hollowed-out volcano base on a skull-shaped island in the course of the ocean? And between Might of 2023 and November of 2024 did u do some sus issues in ur capability as a 1099 unbiased contractor whereas within the make use of of MrBeast Inc. LLC, however now ur catching strays on socials via no fault of ur personal (grasp manipulator, fr), and even when he glazed u up on the time, u along with his chilly rodent-like eyes and saying stuff like u are doing all these gucci deeds for me and when the UN lastly is beneath my complete management u are going to get a sick elevate, however perhaps now, after all of the issues that occurred particularly between 5/2023 and 11/2024, and u didn’t even find yourself getting the elevate so ur understandably feeling a little bit salty about it, why not come meet with us and spill the tea (legally talking we’ve got to tell u it’s a deposition)?

We will’t say a lot, but when any of the next sounds acquainted, we must always discuss:

  • Did u journey to worldwide waters and yeet sum1 out of an enormous catapult?
  • Or make a household of 5 from Lengthy Island grovel in a hole-in-the-ground ass pit?
  • Possibly u shackled roughly sixteen individuals collectively on this sus desert island with out even any actual meals, aside from a case of Feastables-brand chocolate bars, and seventeen of these individuals have been mysteriously absent when u confirmed up for work the subsequent day.
  • Have u come into contact with an individual sporting a monocle and recognized solely as Professor Octavius Ravenblood?
  • Maybe u personally witnessed MrBeast unalive a number of of these lacking youngsters from North Dakota.
  • Did u, together with as much as fifteen different “Beast Mode Commandos,” illegally enter Somalia for some motive?

IYKYK.

Even when it slapped on the time, perhaps ur shook about it now? Possibly u even feared for ur life if u didn’t go together with issues? Giving human rights violations, sis! Cringe! And was there even an HR division the place u may go w ur tremendous legit considerations? Doubt it!

If any of this feels like one thing u perhaps did on the request of MrBeast or his proxies, let’s discuss and safe this bag. It’s time for ex-henchman summer season lol.

Let’s take this W collectively, fam!

Dankly urs,
Whitney Carmichael
First-year affiliate at Findley and Wasserman, LLC.